To date or not to date

The perfect man or woman does not exist except in your head and heart

In the year that I had my last boyfriend I experienced some of the worst pain going through heartbreak whilst also in the same breath undergoing an amazing journey of self-discovery.  Even though it took me a long time to get to that happy medium that I am at now since shifting feelings of grief, anger and insecurity. I’m proud of myself today that I can look back on the last two years as somewhat of a learning curve.

Since jumping back on the saddle I feel at a loss, when did dating become so complicated???

I look back on my relationships during my teens when it was so easy.  I could say how I felt without feeling that it was too soon to do so.  Or knew immediately that the individual and I were exclusive without having to now play along until the guy decided he liked me enough to want to throw some cuffs on me.

Right now, I am dating a cool guy an even though on my part I feel like we’re approaching the “wow shit is getting serious now…” stage.  I am being inundated with all types of advice with regards to how I should broach the topic of ‘exclusivity’ with him.

All these concepts and rules seem pretty pointless to me as not every individual that we date have the same make up which in my mind makes it impossible to apply the same principles.

As we get older it seems our priorities change and what was once appealing then might not be so now.  We now try to whittle our potential life partner down to how well they fit in with our lifestyle, whether or not we share the same values, how attracted we are to them and sometimes also include our very unrealistic expectations.

For me, I believe that If you really like someone, then you should have no problem investing in that person and also enabling things to flow naturally that means being able to discuss where BOTH of you see things going. Something of which is next on my agenda…


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