Why do you hate me so…

Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches

At some point or another, someone is going to dislike you. Whether it’s down to the way in which you dress or simply for just being YOU.

Being accepted by others is very important to most people. So when we do encounter someone who seems to really hate the stuffing out of us it can be really easy to try to find justifications as to why. This can often at times lead us to start blaming ourselves when in actuality you’ve done nothing to cause them to feel this way. Unless of course you have provoked them at some point or another and are now feeling the magnitude of their upset but in most instances forgiveness usually replaces the hate.

There have been many times in the past in my need to be liked where I felt as though I had to adapt myself quite like a chameleon in order to receive validation from others. This eventually over a period of time led me to feel uncomfortable in my own skin due to my over-investment in others.

It took some time to realise that I couldn’t look to other people for my value. An when I stopped putting so much emphasis on everyone else’s opinions I was able to start to realise that I loved myself completely and enough to put my needs first and not only that but I stopped giving others the authority to control my life in some way.

One thing you need to remember is that you can’t change people’s behaviour – only your own. Try not to obsess over this. If someone hates you. It is their problem, not yours.

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